→Seol 66: Dark night
Dec. 9th, 2009 02:55 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
Tiddia wrote to me but I haven't been able to write back because I'm really, really, sick. Sick like after that Adept died, almost as sick as back when we came to Silvermoon. I can write in this journal just fine, but if I think about going outside, even if I look at a letter-size piece of parchment I feel sick and frightened and I can't get out of my bed.
I have to go back to Silvermoon to report to the Masters eventually but whenever I think about it I feel like I'm going to die.
I'm ashamed of myself.
Astro and I were making good progress during the week before I got sick. She's becoming so strong, I'm so proud of her and maybe I'm a little bit scared. But then because I got sick she had to stop training to take care of me.
I'm a burden I'm bad I'm going to get better. I'm already getting better. I'm going to get better and everything will become normal again like it always does and I will be able to do a good job for the Shattered Sun and for the Blood Knights and for my mother and my father and my wife.
It's not my fault that I'm sick. It's nobody's fault when he gets sick. It's not my fault and I'm not broken and bad. I'm weak now but I can get stronger, I can get stronger, I can get stronger
I have to go back to Silvermoon to report to the Masters eventually but whenever I think about it I feel like I'm going to die.
I'm ashamed of myself.
Astro and I were making good progress during the week before I got sick. She's becoming so strong, I'm so proud of her and maybe I'm a little bit scared. But then because I got sick she had to stop training to take care of me.
It's not my fault that I'm sick. It's nobody's fault when he gets sick. It's not my fault and I'm not broken and bad. I'm weak now but I can get stronger, I can get stronger, I can get stronger