seol_plumfall: (seol)

The young elf leaned his head back against the cushions, watching the violet-skinned girl dry her hair. With those fragile wrists and tiny fingers, her small body curving forward, the delicate shapes of her spine and shoulderblades showing through the thin cloth of her undershirt, she was roughly scrubbing her head and horns without a hint of elegance or grace. She lowered the cloth and tossed her wet hair, sneezed, and smeared her nose against her arm; then she blinked as the boy began to laugh at her.

He restrained his chuckling and shook his head, a characteristic awkward smile twisting his lips, and waved apologetically at the glaring girl. "You are cute," he said, truthfully.

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seol_plumfall: (seol)
Every day I am happy that Astrolabe is near to me to help me and to teach me patiently.

Some days ago Astrolabe returned from Darnassus. She met various people in that city, but she did not manage to find a master warrior to train her. She did not want to go to Stormwind or the Exodar, and though I said she could go to Ironforge, she said that she was tired and tired of the distance from me, so she came home.

Our father told me that perhaps she should not wander everywhere looking for a teacher who knows of the Light but will not mistake her for a paladin when her husband is here in Shattrath and serves the Shattered Sun with the Light and a sword. He discussed it with our mother and with Astrolabe and they both agreed, they want me to be her teacher before any other man or woman.

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seol_plumfall: (seol)
Dear Light,

Help me

I want to feel pleasure.

I want to feel pleasure and to desire pleasure like a normal person.

I dont want to have to pretend that when I feel grief and when I feel pity that I am feeling pleasure.

I dont want to have to figure out what pleasure is by feeling for the gaps in pain. I dont want to run away from pain and pretend that it is the same thing as running towards pleasure.

I want to feel pleasure and desire

I dont want to be afraid that my pleasure is not really pleasure and that I will never be able to tell the difference between pleasure and relief.

I want to be able to have a desire for Astrolabe that does not have inside it a fear that my desire is not real. I want to be able to have a desire that is desire, like a normal person


give me faith.

I need to believe in pleasure.

believe in chocolate

Seol 61 ← Seol 62 → Astrolabe 29
seol_plumfall: (seol)
To whom it may concern:



what the fel "paladin-sexual"

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seol_plumfall: (seol)

You know that I do not like when you leave suddenly. But I know you will be extra sweet to me when you return to make me feel better.

I could not convince Jia to return to Silvermoon. She said that to make her go I would have to bend her body under my strength or I would have to arrest her as a Master. And she knows I will not do these things, so she won. She, Pietro, and Cosimo ^and Galenos are staying on the Scryers Tier. Pietro is going to go back to Silvermoon to watch the house for a little while, until I can hire someone else because Tiddia needs to go work soon.

I cannot even go see my sister because the Scryers know my face.

Why are you not here to rub the tear off of it and make me feel better?

Helaah 2 ← Seol 57 → Seol 58
seol_plumfall: (Default)
Lately I have been thinking about souls. I have also been thinking that I shouldn't be thinking about souls because I still have not finished thinking about the Light for the first draft of my essay. There is only one section left for me to write. Maybe that is why I do not want to write it. I am afraid -- actually, not afraid, more embarrassed, as I feel myself blushing even just writing this -- I am embarrassed to firmly state, "this is indeed what I believe the Light is," I guess because the firmness of my belief does not actually exist and really I am very ignorant and extremely confused.

But I ought to finish it so that I can begin to translate it. I am very worried about Astrolabe, I have never seen her have a sad mood that lasted this long. If we become busy writing and translating, maybe she will become enthusiastic and laugh with excitement again. I cannot give my body for her consumption to please her, but I can give my words for her critique and please her?

Then I will show it to Helaah. Abelar told me that he and Helaah used to write each other letters about the Light and ethics before their marriage. I would really like her to criticize and help me.

But I'm a little bit extremely terrified.

I guess I better get to work.

Seol 53 ← Seol 54 → Seol 55
seol_plumfall: (seol)

Today I confessed to Tiddia and it was fine. After was the same as before. She treated me very kindly today and complimented me on many strange things. She at least thinks I look more like a man than a boy now, and I was flattered. And when I told her the story she was not angered or frightened, I think at least, and when I asked if she thought I was weak for still having a panic reaction to that, she still said I was perfect the way that I am.

Maybe she was just saying especially nice things to make me calm down, but I was so happy to hear those kind words. And she says she wants to join the Ebon Blade so that she can stand in Icecrown with the army that protects life in order to protect me and to protect the ones I love. I was so happy to hear that.

Will you forgive her, Astrolabe? It is not fair of me to ask such a thing of Astrolabe when she is still so unhappy. I feel bad, I should have discouraged her from touring Draenor, I should have known that what she would see would upset her.


I am so happy that Tiddia wants to protect my Astrolabe. Because my Astrolabe is, to me, perfect the way she is.

Astrolabe 27 ← Seol 53 → Seol 54
seol_plumfall: (seol)

I know you try to make a joke with the mask and the "now you will love me because I am a blood elf" but it's not Various things happened today.

I was afraid to confess to Tiddia so I did not go home to the apartment in Silvermoon quickly. I went to M'uru's room instead because I wanted to feel that love so I would be a little braver. But I found Shuuken there. It was strange. She said she heard music that called her there. I wonder if Shuuken "hears" the spirits and the breath of the earth the way that I "feel" the Light.

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seol_plumfall: (seol)
Maybe I overdid it. In any case, after the last letter, I think things will get better. I will not give up.

But I am still feeling a bit cranky so I came down here to rest a little bit before I go back to the apartment. Because although I want to make her understand I do not want to hurt her by coming home with a tearful face or to say something selfish and upsetting because I wasn't thinking calmly. And I cannot go home to Astrolabe for this purpose because if I tell her about this incident I think she will just get angrier with Tiddia and probably get angry at me too.

And while I was lying down here and thinking about the letters I think I figured something out that I need to write down before I forget.

The reason that I cried so much when I met A'dal and the other naaru in Shattrath for the first time.

It was not because being near to the naaru makes me feel the pangs of the Light in my chest, the sorrow and suffering of the Light - that is the reason I still cry and the reason I feel so much pain near them.

But the reason that I cried so much the first time, which I did not understand very well at the moment, was, I think...

that the naaru saw my pain and looked at me and said, "we feel it, too."

and then Astrolabe came to me and felt it, too...

Seol 47 ← Seol 48 → Seol 49
seol_plumfall: (seol)

Now I will write down the things that happened in Silvermoon because I have calmed down. But by the Light you have strange ideas of what is humorous

My sister went on a trip. I am not as worried as Pietro is. When Jia began to go on outings with Galenos I was very worried, but actually he is very intelligent and good with a bow and Jia is as safe traveling with him as she is traveling with any Farstrider. And Jia is not just a good mage, but she is very sensible and does not do silly things. She will stay by the roads and travel in a group and go from Horde post to Horde post. In that way she really is a lot smarter than her brother who goes to try to make friends with the Alliance every few months.

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seol_plumfall: (seol)

By the Light

I am glad that Tiddia does not actually hate me and says she will try to be kinder to me and maybe she does indeed accept my love. And she listened to me explain the problem with the peace of the Scourge and she hopefully heard me and it is all good but

By the Light.

By the Light.

B y   t h e   L i g h t .

If I really had to I would do it

But I think that Astrolabe must have misunderstood Tiddia's Common. Right?

Pietro 7 ← Seol 45 → Astrolabe 25
seol_plumfall: (seol)
I did not die. I was saved by the very kind Lady Elayia, for whom I must write harder, and the not-a-paladin Kriegus, and by Ruepert who took considerable risks for my sake, and by Tiddia.

Tiddia came to look for me. She did not go to the necromancers. She came back to the Cathedral to look for me because I was late. I am so happy that she did not go to the necromancers. I am so happy for her soul.

But I think that it is like I thought, and that Tiddia does not want anything to do with me anymore.

No matter how hard I try, what I do, as sincere as I try to be

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seol_plumfall: (seol)

I made a mistake. I was very tired while studying and I fell asleep. And now I woke up and the draenei potion has stopped working, and I am here in the basement of the Cathedral of Stormwind with my long ears and green eyes and no armor at all.

I am afraid I am going to die.

And I must make a confession to you if I am going to die.

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seol_plumfall: (empty)
I hated my parents.

They never punished me. They were never angry or pleased with what I did. Sometimes I could annoy them and get them to leave me alone for a while. But mostly they didn't care at all.

It's not like they didn't notice or didn't know what was going on. The nanny or governess would always report everything to them. And I would always get the exact books I needed and clothes that were just the right size. And when I asked for a whole set of imported dolls with real doll-sized Mageweave clothes, they gave it to me. Because they loved me no matter what.

No matter what.

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seol_plumfall: (Default)

I think that the important things all ended safely. "Coria" is safe, and her friend is being very good to both of us. I do not know yet if there will be a guest in our house again soon, or if there will be one in Jj's house, or none anywhere. But things will be all right, I think.

But we are going to try to get Coria her money from when she was alive. We must go to the city, and it may be a little dangerous. But we are going to try to use a transformation potion to enter quietly. Although I do not speak your language very well, I asked for a potion of your type. I think maybe I will learn more about you that way.

Would you like to come with us? The potion does not last a very, very long time, and "vigorous activity" might break the spell, but maybe it is a chance for you.

Your husband.

Seol 37 ← Seol 38 → Jiajia 2
seol_plumfall: (empty)
Guest post by Lynod

Dearest Helaah,

I should be happy today. Today I have truly gained a son. Today I have seen my daughter's greatest wish realized. I have thought about this occasion for decades, planning little scenarios and feeling a rush of pride and joy within my breast.

I feel none of that today, however, which confirms the selfishness within me. I, we, Helaah have lost Astrolabe to adulthood. I have always delighted in the precociousness that has dwelled in our strange, beautiful daughter, but I feel like it has brought me heartache now. I expected that I had decades before my precious flower was plucked, and I suppose I did not expect it despite all of the signs of burgeoning.

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seol_plumfall: (ooc)

Modified version of the script and a photoshoot that actually happened the day before the wedding. :3 Because my computer is not quite buff enough to effectively two-box with the graphics/resolution turned up really high.


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